


Brothers

by egoismt



Series: Supernatural Fanfic Translations [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Canon, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, Bible Quotes, Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, During Canon, Emotional Hurt, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Canon, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:21:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28786374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egoismt/pseuds/egoismt
Summary: SPN season 6 pre-canon and during-canon fanfic.My head canon story about the relationship between Balthazar and Castiel.＊In order to tell the story, some plots of this fic were adapted from the content of the Bible, please be aware of it before reading.
Relationships: Balthazar/Castiel (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Supernatural Fanfic Translations [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2105196
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Brothers 兄弟](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28530951) by [egoismt](https://archiveofourown.org/users/egoismt/pseuds/egoismt). 



> Welcome to leave a kudo or comment and share your experience of reading this fic with me! Enjoy! ^^
> 
> ＊I tried to translate my own Chinese fanfic without a Beta, but English is not my native language. I apologize for all the typos and grammar mistakes. If you could point out my errors, I would be very much appreciated. :)

When Balthazar and Castiel just learned to fly, Gabriel took them to the shoreline of the earth. Balthazar was chasing the waves excitedly, while Castiel squatted on the ground, being interested in watching a little grey fish heaving itself up on the beach.

"What are you looking at?" Balthazar couldn't help being curious, and approached Castiel, who silently pointed to the little figure fighting on the ground.

"Don't step on that fish, Castiel. Big plans for that fish." Gabriel said leisurely, shaking his wings against the sea breeze.

The two young angels who had just been off the line watched fascinatedly as the little creature moved its fins vigorously, dragging a small track along the muddy shore. Just as Balthazar began to feel bored and looked away, Castiel suddenly spoke:

"Something’s wrong with it."

"What?"

The little gray fish was writhing and struggling desperately on the muddy ground, Castiel's calm expression showed a trace of worry.

"Hypoxia? Do you want to put it back in the water?" Balthazar deduced from the knowledge being instilled into his brain.

"No, leave it alone; don't forget that we angels can't interfere." Gabriel cast a warning look at the younger brothers in his charge.

Balthazar shrugged indifferently, and walked away to pick the shells. Castiel, who was squatting on the ground, continued to stare at the fish that was rolling in pain, the wrinkles between his brows getting deeper and deeper, he secretly raised his eyes and glanced at Gabriel, while the other one was looking in another direction, he reached out and touched the fish lightly. A faint golden light flashed, the fish seemed to relax, paused for a while then continued to crawl forward, Castiel's eyes softened, the corners of his lips slightly cocked.

"..." Balthazar saw the whole thing, raised his eyebrows and let out a snort, began to smile slightly and unconsciously.

"Don't think I don't know what you did, Castiel." Gabriel folded his arms around his chest, staring at Castiel solemnly.

"You said there are big plans for it, how could you just let it die now?" The young angel raised his head with a defiant expression.

"It has to learn to breathe on land someday anyway. Cas just push it forward a little bit. It should be okay to shorten the learning period?" Balthazar put his hand on Castiel's shoulder and said with a smile.

Castiel turned his head and raised his eyebrows. "What did you just call me?"

"Cas!"

"You’ve never called me that before..."

"It's a catchy nickname! You may call me ‘Balthy’ as well! I don't mind."

"Enough for you two!" Gabriel cleared his throat feeling both annoyed and funny, and waved his hand. "Since you didn't deviate from our father's plan, I'll overlook it this time; but just this once." After finishing speaking, he poked Castiel's forehead hard with his fingertips.

"Hey!" The young angel covered his forehead in pain and glared at his brother.

"Gabe is the best, the kindest one~~" Balthazar smiled and slapped Castiel on the back vigorously, who staggered for that.

"Even you... (Angry)"

"It's great to escape the bloody punishment, right?"

Balthazar grinned broadly at Castiel. Seeing that smile, the grumpy latter had to silently endure his own temper.

"Alright! Let’s call it a day and go home!"

Gabriel stretched out his hands and tousled his younger brothers’ hair, spreading his wings into the air. The blue planet quietly watched the three angels fly away.

*****

Angels are warriors of God. Although their true forms can be seen and touched by their own kind, but they don't have bodies like human, nor gender. Their birth are no different from product manufacturing. When they go offline, they take the built-in knowledge and the teenaged true forms with them, and join the rigorous combat training of heavenly host. They don't have childhood and don't know how to act like a baby. Each one has an unique personality, but they are all soldiers. They are close and distant. They rarely touch each other, except for the Gabriel trio.

At first, he grumbled about it all the time, but when the idle Gabriel bit the bullet and took over the two recruits Michael assigned to him, he finally felt hopeful for the boring life in heaven. Balthazar was frivolous, clever, and hit it off with him; Castiel was calmer and more composed, but his rigid, stubborn and sometimes a little off personality made it interesting to tease him.

The two new angels also evolved from strangers into tacit friends quickly. When Balthazar got into trouble, Castiel would find a way to help him fix the problem; when Castiel was provoked, Balthazar would pick up a stick and fight by his side. The two brothers taking care of each other saved Gabriel from worrying; and the out-of-line duo were also relieved to be able to stay with the easygoing and unruly Gabriel.

"Hey Cas, I'm taking a bet with Anna and the others, do you wanna join?" Balthazar yelled as he walked into the library.

"Keep it down!" Castiel replied with an irritated frown, his eyes were still glued to the sheepskin scroll.

"What to bet on?"

"Guess which monkeys are gonna make it? Homo sapiens or the Neanderthals?"

Castiel tilted his head, "Neanderthals!"

"Why?! I bet on Homo sapiens! What are you thinking?"

Castiel sighed. "Their poetry is... just amazing. It's in perfect tune with the spheres. It’ll be a shame for them to be extinct."

"Humph, a nerd answer as always."

"Don't criticize other people's interests if you don't study!" Castiel gave Balthazar a look; the latter was still shaking his head with a smiley face as if looking for a beating.

"Then, what bet do you wanna place?"

"What about you?"

"Night shift for a week."

"I’m in."

"Okay, I'll tell Anna."

Balthazar patted Castiel on the shoulder, turned around and walked away. Just as Castiel thought he could finally read the scroll in a quiet room as before, the melodious voice came again:

"Cas said he bets the Neanderthals will win with night shift for **two weeks**."

"Wow, so generous!"

The young angel immediately bounced from his seat and shouted, **"Balthazar~~~~~~!!!"**

*****

Castiel did so so in unarmed combat, but with his superb flying skills, speed, and an agile and thoughtful mind, he did well in air combat and tactics classes. As for Balthazar, with his cleverness and shrewdness, he managed to pass every subject by the skin of his teeth with little effort.

"I really hate fighting each other..." After returning to their room, Castiel collapsed in a chair exhaustedly, didn't want to move at all. "It's more interesting to watch the bees."

"Says the one who beat his opponent in the tactics class and smiled proudly." Balthazar said teasingly.

" You’re in no position to judge me. You could get better grades by being more serious. You just had to fool around."

"It doesn't matter what grades I got in the classes. The winner is the one who survives the bloody battle! You took it too seriously."

"If you don't practice hard now, how could you use it without thinking in the battlefield?"

"My specialty is to improvise on-site! It's called ‘talent’ and has nothing to do with practice!"

Castiel couldn't help rolling his eyes, Balthazar chuckled.

**_"Castiel, Balthazar, emergency call-up!"_** Anna's urgent call came from the angel radio. ** _"Bring your weapons, Lucifer rebelled!"_**

**"What?!"**

The two angels shouted in unison, paled and grabbed their angel blades, teleported to the battlefield. The battle cries and screams of the two camps shook the sky, there was chaos all around.

"How..." Seeing the bloody corpse of his angel classmate lying by his feet, Balthazar said with a trembling voice.

 **"Find Anna and Gabriel first!"** Castiel yelled, frowning with concentration, swinging his blade to block his sibling’s indiscriminate attack.

"!"

The enemy's neck was pierced with a blade, Anna coldly watched the corpse fall, bursting out the last glorious energy of his grace.

"Anna!"

"I don't have time to explain now, come with me!"

The three teleported to the gathering place of the recruits. Anna repressed the panic and restlessness of the crowd, after some explanation, everyone realized that Lucifer, who refused to bow down to the Son, leads a third of the angels in revolt against God in the north, and the archangel Michael is leading the suppression.

"A lot of powerful angels have joined Lucifer, and now the battle is in a stalemate... Although you are recruits, you must be mentally prepared for the battlefield." Ishim, the higher-ranking commander on-site, gave the order coldly and began to organize the recruits for dispatch.

"Cas..." Balthazar looked at Castiel worriedly; the latter pressed his lips tightly and looked at Gabriel standing in the corner, who kept silent with a serious frowned face.

*****

The tragic Angel War continued to the second day, the recruits were also forced to fight their own kind on the battlefield.

"Brother, please. I don't want to hurt you!"

Castiel held the blade, pleading. Seeing that the opponent was still coming with murderous aura, he gritted his teeth, the silver light flashed with a flying blade, the opponent's grace exploded in screams.

"Why won't any of you listen?..." He frowned and whispered in upset.

**"Forget it, Cas, everyone is in the heat of the bloody war, no one will listen to you!"**

Balthazar, who was covered in blood standing behind Castiel’s back, shouted and stabbed the blade into the chest of his sibling.

**"Quit thinking, concentrate on fighting!"**

"Damn it!..."

Castiel stepped forward to retrieve his angel blade, looked worriedly at Gabriel in the distance, who was uninjured but with a pained expression. The latter bit his lower lip tightly, and a trace of blood shed.

That night, Gabriel left without saying goodbye.

With the strip of cloth showing **_"I've had enough!"_** tightly gripped in hand, Balthazar trembled with tears threatening to fall; Castiel gently put his hand on Balthazar’s shoulder, with a sad look in his eyes, didn’t say a single word.

*****

After the war subsided, the originally lively recruits fell into abnormal silence. The deaths and injuries of acquaintances made everyone depressed, only Uriel was still stubbornly holding on, wanted to use his humor to make everyone feel better.

Anna, who had made great achievements in the war, became Ishim's lieutenant and was responsible for the regrouping of recruits. Castiel, Balthazar, Uriel and some other angels were assigned into a team and sent to station in the southern part of heaven. While continuing their training, they also began to share the work of the regular army.

In the constant service, Castiel recalled the blue planet where the little gray fish was. One day, he and Balthazar looked down from the clouds, thinking they would see their father’s newly created humans thriving on earth, but only saw Cain break his brother Abel’s head with the jawbone of an animal in the field.

"Apes are apes." Balthazar said with a sneer.

Castiel recalled his bloody hands in the Angel War, and silently thought: _"In fact, we’re not that different..."_

"Cas...?" Balthazar asked uncertainly, looking at his tranced face.

Castiel suddenly returned to his senses, pursed his lips and smiled bitterly, then shook his head slightly.

*****

Today, from a faintly upset Anna, a new order arrived. Their father confirmed that the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah was as evil as the outcry against them accused, and Ishim ordered Castiel, Balthazar and Uriel to be sent to "purify" the two cities.

"I don't wanna deal with those mud monkeys, you two go first, I’ll take action when you call."

"Uriel, you slacker, you dodged too fast!" Balthazar gave him an irritated glance.

Castiel lowered his eyes; his lips were pressed into a straight line.

"Cas, you show that expression again." Balthazar sighed helplessly. "I know what are you and Anna struggling with, but orders are orders."

"I know, it's just..."

"They violated the commandments and committed the sin first. There’s nothing to sympathize with." Uriel said coldly.

Balthazar slapped Castiel on his back. "If you think too much, you can't get anything done. Let's go see the bloody towns first. One step at a time!"

That night, the two vessel-possessed angels arrived in Sodom. They planned to take their night's rest in the street, but the resident Lot fell down on his face to the earth and requested strongly, they went with him into his house at last. Even though they don’t need to eat, they still graciously ate the food he served.

"This wine is so good!" Balthazar was pleasantly surprised like discovering a whole new world.

Castiel frowned and took a bite of unleavened bread. "This tastes like... molecules..."

Before they had gone to bed, they heard the loud voices coming from outside the house, all the men of Sodom, young and old, crying out for Lot to send his guests out to them, so that they may take their pleasure with them. Lot went outside and dealt with the crowd, through the door, they heard that he was willing to exchange his two unmarried daughters for the safety of his guests.

"Cas." Balthazar said with a serious face.

Castiel raised his hand, "Just wait."

It didn't take long for the noises to become more intense outside, and the door was creaked from being violently pushed.

"Cas!"

Without saying a word, the young angel teleported to the door, put out his hand and took Lot into the house, then shut the door again. Balthazar raised the corner of his mouth and snapped his fingers. Everyone outside seemed blind immediately, and was tired out with looking for the door.

"This is for your sake, otherwise I would have killed them all." Balthazar smiled and said to Castiel. The latter nodded with a faint smile, turned to Lot, who was still in shock, informed him their purpose of the trip, and asked Lot to take all of his family out of the city for refuge.

While Lot went out to deliver the message obediently, Balthazar pulled the corner of Castiel's clothes and said in a small voice, "Is it okay to take it upon yourself to save them? The superiors didn't say that we can let a single one go!"

Castiel nodded solemnly, "Lot is a righteous man, I believe our father will agree to save his whole family."

Balthazar shrugged, "Well, if you say so. If Ishim is gonna be pissed about it, don't blame me for not reminding you!"

Castiel smiled without saying a word.

When morning came, they urged Lot to take his wife and two daughters to go, but Lot was waiting, the angels had to take him, his wife and his daughters by the hand, and put them outside the town.

"Go for your life, without looking back or waiting in the lowland; go quickly to the mountain or you will come to destruction." Castiel exhorted.

Lot said: "I am not able to get as far as the mountain before evil overtakes me and death," and begged them to let him go to the small town nearby (Zoar) instead. Balthazar looked reluctant, but Castiel agreed: " See, I’ve given you your request in this one thing more: we won’t send destruction on that town. Go there quickly, for we’re not able to do anything till you have come there."

The Lot family left thankfully. Balthazar raised an eyebrow and glanced at Castiel. "Humph, give him an inch and he’ll take a bloody mile. Is it really worth it to take such a heavy responsibility for him?"

Castiel said confidently: "Every life counts. If the superiors have issues with it, I’ll take full responsibility."

Watching his stubborn expression, Balthazar sighed and shook his head.

Seeing the Lot family arrived in Zoar from a distance, Balthazar called Uriel, who was on standby in heaven, and the "purification" began. Fire and flaming smoke raining down from heaven on Sodom and Gomorrah, sent destruction on those towns, with all the lowland, all the people of those towns, and every green thing in the land. Lot's wife heard the loud noise and couldn't help looking back curiously from behind him, in the blink of an eye, the crystal-like weapon in Balthazar's hand turned her into a pillar of salt.

"Balthazar!"

"Heaven's order is absolute; those who violate must be punished. It’s not negotiable." Balthazar said coldly, toyed with the weapon in his hand. "Hey! This little thing Anna lent me is surprisingly useful. We should get one for ourselves if we get the chance."

"..." Castiel looked at the wailing Lot and his daughters from a distance, pursing his mouth and closing his eyes in pain.

Balthazar glanced at him and decided to remain silent.

*****

"Purification" was completed, Castiel and Balthazar returned to heaven with a heavy heart. As soon as they entered the door, they saw Ishim angrily waiting there with his arms folded, Anna next to him gave them a worried look.

"Did I say anything about allowing any filthy ape to escape? Huh?"

"Lot is a righteous man, our father would save them too!" Castiel argued in self-confident. Balthazar thought to himself that this guy really doesn’t know how to take a hint, their boss is already angry, what did he want to add fuel to the bloody fire...?

Ishim sneered, "Even if I allow you to spare the ‘righteous man’ Lot , why did you save his family?"

Castiel squinted in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Do you know that Lot's daughters are also sinners and should be purified too?"

"What? They’re just innocent girls..."

"No, it won't take long for them to get their dad drunk, and sleep with him!"

"I don't believe you..." Castiel shook his head in shock.

"It's true, it doesn't matter if you believe it or not!"

Castiel looked at Anna in disbelief, who lowered her eyes and quietly nodded.

"..." Castiel lowered his head and tightened his lips.

"Let them go was the decision we made together. I’m willing to be punished as well." Balthazar said in a deep voice.

"No! This was totally my own willful decision; he shouldn’t be blamed for it!" Castiel raised his head anxiously to plead; Balthazar really wanted to kick his shin, this chucklehead, will he stop being such a stick-in-the-mud just for one bloody second?

"Castiel is telling the truth. I heard Balthazar discourage him." Standing on the side, Uriel said calmly.

"Uriel, you jerk...!"

 **"Balthazar, shut up! Or I'll punish you too!"** Ishim shouted.

Balthazar opened his mouth angrily, but before he even said a word, he was sent back to their room by Anna with a snap of her fingers. Castiel gave her a thankful look and puffed out his chest.

"I’m ready to pay the price."

"Good."

Ishim sneered, and ordered his angel soldiers to take Castiel's blade, and put him in a jail in heaven to wait for his punishment. Uriel and Anna glanced at him sympathetically. He pressed his mouth tightly, still had that stubborn expression on his face, and disappeared with Ishim's soldiers.

*****

Castiel was carried back to their room by two angels, with a blood-stained bandage wrapped around his right eye and half of his head, unconscious. As soon as they entered the door, Balthazar, who was sulking in bed, jumped up, rushed to Castiel, and asked nervously, "What's wrong with him?"

One of the angels raised his eyebrow coldly, "You know it already."

Balthazar gritted his teeth and helped the angels settle Castiel on the bed. Then he sat on the edge of the bed and started to clean up his brother, didn't even notice when the other angels went out.

Removed the blood-stained bandage and wiped off the dark red blood on the white face, Balthazar patted Castiel's cheek, softly calling out, "Hey Cas, Cas! Wake up!" Castiel's eyelids trembled; Balthazar's frowning brows finally relaxed.

"Are you okay……?"

The young angel opened his eyes slowly; Balthazar gasped at the shocking blood-red right eye. Castiel stared at the ceiling with hollow eyes for a long time, blinking a few times before moving to Balthazar's anxious face.

"... Baltha... zar..."

"Hey." Balthazar smiled gently.

"Why am I... here...?" Castiel frowned tightly, and struggled to put his hand on his aching right eye.

"Heaven's ' **persuasion** '." Balthazar smiled wryly.

"'Persuasion'...? What happened? What have I done...?" Castiel tilted his head in confusion.

Balthazar froze, his smile vanished.

"You don’t remember?"

"Remember what?"

"Sodom... Lot..."

The young angel just stared at him blankly.

Balthazar gritted his teeth, changed into a calm and soothing smile.

"It's okay, no big deal, it doesn't matter if you don't remember."

"Oh..." Castiel closed his eyes wearily.

Balthazar gently stroked his head, "Go to sleep... I’ll stay here with you..."

*****

Castiel had changed. The melancholy and struggled expression no longer appeared, instead there was some kind of hollow and natural coldness on his face. The missions for him were executed fast and ruthlessly. Even Ishim viewed him in a new light.

"The Tower of Babel fell." Castiel said with a straight face.

"Without the sense of their language, these mud monkeys can't make waves anymore." Uriel smiled triumphantly.

Balthazar looked into Castiel's clear but empty eyes and pressed his lips together; Anna on the side looked away silently.

*****

On this day, Ishim's angel troops were sent to Egypt to perform the so-called "PR" task. The angels watched coldly as the children of Israel put lamb’s blood on the two sides of the door and over the door of their houses, waited silently for the commander's order.

The time was up, Anna ordered the angels to go through the land of Egypt, sending death on every first male child, of man and of beast. When giving that order, her clenched fists trembled slightly; Balthazar, who had always been indifferent, also frowned, but Castiel was still numb and obedient like a puppet.

When the angels began to hear the mournful wails, Anna closed her eyes. Castiel abruptly gasped and pressed his hand on the acutely painful right eye, reeling from agony.

"Cas?!" Balthazar was the first one to find out something was wrong, rushed over to support him. Castiel gritted his teeth hard and panted, blood oozing from his fingers.

"Are you hurt? How come?!"

"No... I... Ahhh!" He knelt to the ground in pain, pressing his head that felt like it was about to explode hard with both hands.

 **"The Rit Zien! Here! Man down!"** Balthazar shouted.

"No! Baltha... Stop it! Stop it now! No more killing!"

Castiel abruptly raised his head, his bloody fingers clutching Balthazar's sleeves; the latter watched with horror as his brother's right eye, which had returned to normal, turned blood-red again, and the blood continued to drip from the corner of it. The expression of grief and pain belonged to Balthazar’s long-lost old friend.

"Cas, you..."

Castiel panted, his desperate but determined eyes, exactly the same as the good old days.

"Let go of him, Balthazar!" Ishim who appeared at some point coldly commanded, "Give him to me."

"No!" Balthazar stood between Ishim and Castiel, about to pull out his angel blade, but another blade had already been put to his neck, Anna, holding the blade, whispered in his ear:

"Don't do anything stupid, think about Cas!"

"!"

Balthazar gritted his teeth hard, bowed his head and slowly dropped his hands.

"Smart boy."

Ishim sneered and ordered two angels to hold Castiel, who was already in semi-consciousness, and the four disappeared out of thin air.

"Anna, what will they do to Cas?" Balthazar looked up at the sky and whispered in pain; Anna retracted the blade, tightened her lips, and turned her head away.

*****

The brief clarity vanished again. Castiel returned to that iron-willed and cold-blooded killer. He never questioned any orders, and carried out the tasks vigorously and resolutely. He was even praised by Ishim as an "angel’s angel".

Every time Balthazar laid eyes on Castiel, he felt a dull pain in the bottom of his heart. That dorky, stubborn old friend who liked to smile and watch the bees, he missed him so much.

They were ordered to secretly help David defeat Goliath, survive countless challenges, and become the king of Judah and Israel. Anna had earned recognition for being a good leader, being promoted, and set up her own garrison. She took her new lieutenant Castiel, Balthazar, Uriel and some other angels away from home, began to watch and be stationed on earth for 2,000 years.

The duty was very boring, yet Balthazar was secretly excited. He found that since Castiel left heaven, no longer under Ishim’s direct control, his past personality was faintly beginning to return.

Until that day, Ishim came with Mirabel and Benjamin, seconded Castiel from Anna, and said they were going to carry out a classified mission on Earth. Anna had to go back to heaven temporarily to fill in for Ishim and manage the troops, and the rest of her garrison had to remain on the perimeter until further instructions or Anna returns.

Balthazar was restless and worried all day, afraid that Castiel would get into trouble during his absence, and had to endure Uriel’s teases from time to time, his mood was so bad yet he couldn’t do anything about it. At last Castiel and Anna came back safely; his anxious finally began to fade.

He nervously waited outside of Anna's office, as soon as Castiel finished reporting to her and walked out of the room; Balthazar put his arm around Castiel's shoulders immediately and squeezed him affectionately.

"How was it? Was it fun to walk among those apes this time?"

"I went to work, not to play." Castiel rolled his eyes irritably, Balthazar couldn't help smiling.

"Ishim didn't do anything to you, right?"

Castiel frowned. "Of course not! Why do you ask?"

"That's good, that's good." Balthazar sighed in relief.

"...What are you hiding from me?"

"Huh?"

"..."

Castiel narrowed his eyes and stared at Balthazar, who felt guilty.

"Oh, I just thought that you rarely went there; maybe Ishim would take you to have some good time..."

"Good time? What do you mean?" Castiel tilted his head in confusion.

"You know, the drinks and..."

Seeing more and more question marks popped up above Castiel’ head, Balthazar had no choice but to break off lamely. The whole thing seemed to end at that point; but he found that Castiel’s thoughtful frown, like Anna, appeared more and more frequently.

*****

After a long psychological struggle, Anna ripped out her grace and fell from heaven at last. The angels of her garrison were shocked and panicked. The lieutenant Castiel was ordered to succeed as the new captain. Balthazar admitted that he wasn’t lieutenant material due to his personality and declined the post, thus it was taken by Uriel.

With the addition of new members Hester, Inias, and Bartholomew from the Ministry of Intelligence, the first mission assigned to Castiel’s garrison was to hunt down their rebellious former captain Anna.

Although Balthazar, who had been Anna’s friend for a long time, felt very sorry for her, orders are orders, his hands were tied. Besides, when Castiel became the new captain, he somehow returned to his old self who was always frowning and full of melancholy. Finally, he was no longer that insensitive, cold-blooded killing angel anymore. This made Balthazar feel familiar and at ease inexplicably, and it also made the days under the command of Cas seem like sheer paradise.

*****

Before even knowing Anna's whereabouts, an urgent dispatch was assigned to order the garrison to join forces with other troops, attack hell and save the righteous man Dean Winchester before the first seal was broken. This was supposed to be a very simple task, destroy the demons who dared to stand in the way, rescue the soul of the righteous man and throw him back into the human world, bang! The end!

But this wasn’t the case. An army of demons led by Alastair stubbornly resisted and caused a great damage to the angel troops. When Balthazar and Uriel finally managed to protect Castiel and rushed to the righteous man with him; the damn ape couldn’t bear the torture and fell, and already broke the first seal long time ago! What on earth are they fighting so hard and sacrificing so much for?!

What was even more annoying was that when Cas first discovered the broken soul, his surprised twinkled eyes... Balthazar had never seen him like that before. He was so fierce and determined, his bright eyes seemed to be the incarnation of thunder and lightning... He gripped the righteous man’s arm tight and rushed into the sky, leaving Balthazar dumbfounded. It wasn't until he heard Uriel's roar that he suddenly came back to his senses, the inexplicable anger began boiling in his mind, he hated Dean Winchester!

Since then, Balthazar refused to participate in any mission related to Dean, even Castiel could do nothing about his persistent attitude. But even if he hadn’t been there to witness the angel’s interaction with the hairless ape, Balthazar knew that Cas’ heart had already fallen for that man...

He bitterly experienced his jealousy, underwent his anger, and avoided Cas' worried questioning eyes. He didn't know how they got to this point, he was helpless...

*****

The fact that Castiel was getting too close to the humans in his charge finally reached their superiors’ ears; he was demoted to Uriel’s subordinate. Despite being punished, his feelings for human beings were beginning to show up again, his doubts about the righteousness of heaven's commands were also deepening day by day. Balthazar tried to admonish him in private for several times, but if Castiel listened, he wasn’t Castiel.

Uriel betrayed heaven and killed his colleagues secretly. Relied on his cleverness, Balthazar barely escaped. Just about to catch his breath, the high-ranking officer Zachariah descended from the sky to reorganize the broken garrison himself. As a result, Castiel was forcibly pulled out of his vessel, dragged back to heaven and was "persuaded" yet again. When he got back, he became that default setting of stone-cold soldier once more...

Balthazar didn't know whether to cry or laugh. He wanted to cry for Cas losing himself, but he also wanted to laugh for Cas being distant towards those nasty hairless apes. The inner struggle was really exasperating...

Anna being caught allowed Balthazar to see Castiel's inner turmoil once again. He was pleased that his friend still kept a shred of his natural self, but he was also a little worried about what these things would get them into. The seals were broken one by one, and the angels died one by one. With Zachariah still keeping his mouth shut, Balthazar really couldn’t grasp what their superiors were planning to do...

The dangerous intuition of "something big was coming" made every angel tense, not to mention Castiel, who was already super serious. Watching him became much gloomier every day made Balthazar’s heart ache, but saving those words of comfort and cheer, he really didn't know what else he could do to calm the restlessness in both of their minds.

*****

The nightmare came true; Castiel followed in Anna’s footsteps, disobeyed the order, was blown up by Raphael, was rescued by their father, was cut off from heaven, was hunted everywhere, fell from home and mingled with those bloody apes, trying to stop the Apocalypse... The garrison also transferred from being a simple watchman to the regular army. A series of ups and downs and battles with the demons day and night made Balthazar extremely exhausted physically and mentally.

He was really tired of it all...

Without Cas by his side, everything was meaningless.

*****

The news that Michael and Lucifer had fallen into the cage in hell together caused chaos in heaven.

It was easy to fake his own death. First, used a weapon he stole to copy his body, created the mark of his scorched wings, dropped his angel blade, bribe a few demons to spread the words, and vanished from the world to do whatever he pleased. From then on, no one would suspect anything anymore. He wanted to be himself, just like Castiel did.

Balthazar immersed in feasting and revelry, satisfied in leading a hedonistic lifestyle, as for the figure that stayed in his mind, he could only know about him by eavesdropping on the rumors of the angels.

It wasn't until a soul deal led Castiel to him, seeing his friend's stubborn blue eyes again, that Balthazar realized that smooth like him could possibly be speechless too. It turned out that so many yearnings and feelings could easily be revived from the dead by just a single glimpse.

Cas became a Seraph, leading a part of the heavenly forces against their older brother Raphael, and the only reason he came here, of course, was to ask for the weapons. His value only lied in providing the weapons?

"As far as I'm concerned, you and me, Cas, nothing's changed. We're brothers. Of course I want to help you."

Yeah, " **brothers** "...

If this word could really sum up everything between them, perhaps, life would be easier for him...

*****

He still risked being targeted and rescued Cas from Raphael's hands; even if he downed a lung later, he used the two marmosets as a decoy for Raphael, and gave Castiel the weapons which his own life depended on as well. Watching Castiel show up to defend him and confronted Raphael, Balthazar couldn't help but feel warmth in the bottom of his heart.

"Now that you have your sword, try not to die by it."

He looked at Castiel with affection, spread his wings and disappeared. No matter how much he wanted to stay with Cas, as long as the two hairless apes were there, there would be no place for himself. He saw that clearly when he was trapped by the ring of holy fire and was forced to give up the soul asset he bought.

So he took every opportunity to mock Dean, to piss Dean off, and hinted to soulless Sam to kill Bobby in order to hurt Dean. These were all out of his own selfishness, so what? He just had to vent his anger...

*****

A crisis could be an opportunity. The fact that Castiel's war in heaven wasn’t going well gave Balthazar an unexpected opportunity to return to the battlefield. He was ordered to save the Titanic, created 50,000 new souls for Castiel’s war machine. Even though his effort was a waste due to Fate’s obstruction, he was happy to be able to stand by Castiel’s side and serve him once again.

Just when he was satisfying his other craving in the gap of the war, the two howler monkeys brought bad news again. The long-term interaction and understanding convinced Balthazar that there had to be a cause, and Castiel’s explanation indeed wasn’t completely unreasonable. He just couldn't help but worry, what will Cas’ intention to suck up all that power into himself cost him? Especially watching Cas show that stubborn expression again, and refused to listen to any advice...

In order to prevent the worst assumptions from coming true, Balthazar reluctantly swallowed his pride and became the double agent for those apes. He didn't want to fight against Castiel, just thinking that since Cas couldn't accept his advice, maybe Cas’ monkeys could talk him down instead?

So Balthazar gave the address where the show gets started to them, secretly praying that Dean could stop Cas from doing anything stupid. There are many ways to win the war, no need to bet on such a high-risk attempt...

After receiving Castiel's summons, Balthazar went with trepidation. He knew how smart the other one was, so he could only carefully avoid revealing flaws in his words, even tried to blame another angel... The only thing he didn't expect was that Castiel had already suspected that he was the Judas in their midst, and all the lies just burned up everything they had into nothing...

Looking at the lonely Castiel from behind, and listening to his painful words, Balthazar couldn't just leave him like that. He hoped Castiel could understand how much feelings he put into the sentence **"You've always got little old me."**

**_I am not a traitor. I'm doing this for you... all for you…_ **

The reply to him was a ruthless blade piercing through his chest, the love of his life whispered in his ear:

"Yes, I'll always have you."

"Cas..."

It's denial, it's surprise, it's the regret that I didn't say the most important words in time, it's everything but only your name left in my mind...

When the angel faded away, he only heard his brother, sadly crying in his heart.

《The End》


	2. Time Sequence of the Events

**Notes:**

The Chinese version of this story was my first SPN fan fic. I wanted to write my head canon story about Balthazar and Castiel’s relationship.

The making of angels should be very practical to me. They are warriors, born to serve God and heaven only. They should be put to use in the shortest possible time, so I personally don’t think there would be any babyhood/childhood for them. "When an angel was made, he already had the knowledge and physical condition of the youthhood, he only needed to be familiar with how to use his true form and master the flying/combat/serving skills through intensive training." I think this setting is more reasonable to me.

In order to comply with the correct chronological sequence of the events, I referred to the show, Wiki, Baidu Encyclopedia and the online Bible page, and made a list of the relevant events in the story from the beginning to the end below. Those who are interested in may take a look. :)

**  
  
Bible Timeline**

<https://biblehub.com/timeline/#complete>   
<http://www.media.org.hk/davincicode/images/human_history.pdf>

**Watching the first fish on the beach (6x20):** Around 380 to 375 Million years ago (megaannum, Ma), the first tetrapods evolved from fish.

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_Earth#Evolution_of_tetrapods>

**Watching the bees (7x21):** Until recently (around 2011), the oldest non-compression bee fossil had been found in New Jersey amber, Cretotrigona prisca of Cretaceous age, a corbiculate bee.A bee fossil from the early Cretaceous (~100 mya), Melittosphex burmensis, is considered "an extinct lineage of pollen-collecting Apoidea sister to the modern bees".

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bee#cite_note-4>

**Homo sapiens (7x21):** Fossils of anatomically modern humans that date from the Middle Paleolithic (about 200,000 years ago) include the Omo-Kibish I remains of Ethiopia and the fossils of Herto Bouri, Ethiopia. Earlier remains now classified as early Homo sapiens, such as the Jebel Irhoud remains from Morocco and the Florisbad Skull from South Africa, have been dated to about 300,000 and 259,000 years old respectively.

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human>

**Neanderthals (7x21):** It is unclear when Neanderthals split from modern humans; studies have produced various intervals ranging from 315,000 to more than 800,000 years ago. The time of divergence of Neanderthals from their ancestor H. heidelbergensis is also unclear. The oldest potential Neanderthal bones are dated to 430,000 years ago, but the classification is uncertain. Neanderthals are known from numerous fossils, especially from after 130,000 years ago.

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neanderthal>

**Angel War:** Before 4000 BC, Revelation 12:7 

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=rev&chapter=12](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=rev&chapter=12)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradise_Lost>

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucifer>

<https://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E8%B7%AF%E8%A5%BF%E6%B3%95>

**Cain kills Abel (6x20):** Before 3000 BC, Genesis 4:8

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=4](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=4)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cain>

**The destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah (6x20):** Between 3200-2067 BC, Genesis 19

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=19](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=19)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodom_and_Gomorrah>

<https://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E6%89%80%E5%A4%9A%E7%91%AA%E8%88%87%E8%9B%BE%E6%91%A9%E6%8B%89>

**Tower of Babel (6x20):** Noah and his family went out of the ark in 2401 BC. It is estimated that the tower was built about 100 years after the flood, before 2100 BC, Genesis 11

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=11](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=gen&chapter=11)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tower_of_Babel>

<https://zh.wikipedia.org/zh-tw/%E5%B7%B4%E5%88%A5%E5%A1%94>

**Slaying every firstborn of Egypt (8x21):** 1446 BC, Exodus 11-12

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?chapter=1&book=exo&version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?chapter=1&book=exo&version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe)

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=exo&chapter=12](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=exo&chapter=12)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plagues_of_Egypt>

**David kills Goliath and becomes the king (6x20):** Between 1024-1003 BC, 1 Samuel 17, 2 Samuel 5

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=1sa&chapter=17](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=1sa&chapter=17)

[https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=2sa&chapter=5](https://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?version=hb5&version=kjv&version=bbe&book=2sa&chapter=5)

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goliath>

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David>

**Stationed on Earth under the command of Anna for 2,000 years (4x10)**

**Killing Lily's daughter and Seraphim Akobel of the sixth choir (12x10):** 1901, Castiel used a female vessel, comrades Ishim, Benjamin, Mirabel and two other angels

**Anna falls from heaven (4x10):** Mar. 1985

**Castiel leads his own garrison/battalion (7x21)**

**Saves Dean from Hell (4x09):** Sep. 18th, 2008

**Castiel and Uriel prepare to purify the town (4x07)**

**Castiel and Uriel hunt down Anna (4x09. 10)**

**Castiel is demoted to Uriel's subordinate, then becomes Zachariah's subordinate after Uriel’s death (4x16. 17)**

**Castiel is dragged back to heaven (4x20)**

**Castiel gets Anna caught (4x21)**

**Castiel disobeys, exploded by Raphael and resurrected by God (4x22. 5x01)**

**Stop the Apocalypse , Castiel is resurrected by God again and becomes a Seraph (5x22)**

**Castiel returns to heaven and accepts Crowley's proposal to start a civil war (before 6x03)**

**Civil War in heaven:** Reunion with Balthazar (6x03)

**Balthazar hints to Sam to kill Bobby (6x11)**

**Civil War in heaven:** Balthazar gives the weapons to Castiel (6x15)

**Civil War in heaven:** Balthazar saves the Titanic (6x17)

**Civil War in heaven:** Balthazar becomes the double agent (6x21)

**Civil War in heaven:** Castiel kills Balthazar (6x22)


End file.
